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Review of "SON OF GOD"
By Jayne Waterford
Copyrighted © Jayne Waterford, 2014 Revised 29th May 2014 Revised 3rd January 2015
REVIEW: "SON OF GOD" by Jayne Waterford


I don't know about you but when I see something is about Jesus I get excited because it's going to be about the world of ideas.

But when I'm subjected to a perfect depiction of some guy's faith as a ten year old secure in a church of steady and reliable, fascist symbols I think wow, your brain is dull. Christopher Spencer's "SON OF GOD" (2014) is a painful rendering of remembering.

Let's see what we have:

  • A very good looking Jesus.
  • A blonde Jesus.
  • A tall Jesus.
  • A gorgeous and somehow youthful Mary mother of Jesus.
  • Disciples of great physical variation, most of them white.
  • A population of Palestine that could have sprung from the UK.
  • A smooth cross that may well have been plucked off a necklace.
  • A shroud of Turin that gives off a puff of ash, as if that's the mystery of it all.
  • Quotes taken from all four gospels and slammed together in a way that makes no sense. You will dine with me in paradise today (as Jesus descends into hell to preach for three days) and in the next breath, "God, why have you abandoned me?"
  • We have dialogue lifted directly from the pages of the gospels and shown in the order written
down, as if two thousand years of historical redactive reasoning never happened.
  • We have a Jesus whose side does not weep water separated from blood. A healthy man is taken down from the cross, one kissed by the sun and full of healthy colour. Ergo someone couldn't bear the idea of him being dead.

    This is the faith a white boy. I wonder if it is an account of the Jesus he believed in rediscovered in an exercise book. Or an aged man who has done something rotten and wants in when he dies?

    There's a chance this could have been funny if it wasn't so dumb. There is such a wealth of material to play with in this area but it was largely ignored.

    I skipped the scourging and bought a block of blue with GF crackers, went back in, finished the film, felt oddly sorry for the actors, wondered if they were promised the roles of a life time. I felt slightly shocked when I read who the producers and music was. Why would anyone make this? It either ridicules a specific set of childhood beliefs or laughs at ignorance. 0/10

    Copyrighted ©: Jayne Waterford, 2014

  • Christopher Spencer's
    "SON OF GOD" (2014)

    Director Christopher Spencer
    Producers
    Stars Diogo Morgado, Roma Downey, Sebastian Knapp
    Release Date 22nd May 2014
    Category Comedy
    Running Time 138 minutes (2 hours, 18 minutes)
    Rating M (Violence)
    Origin Mark Burnett and Hans Zimmer on crazy juice.
    Awards ARTnews Movies Stupidest Movie 2014.
    Coda Yes.

    Distributor RIALTO DISTRIBUTION
    Official Blurb "From the award-winning producers of the record-breaking miniseries "THE BIBLE", Roma Downey and Mark Burnett, comes "SON OF GOD", the larger-than-life story of The New Testament, to be released on May 22, 2014. "SON OF GOD" is a major motion picture that brings the life of Jesus Christ to the big screen like never before.

    Told with the scope and scale of an action epic, the

    film features powerful performances, exotic locales, dazzling visual effects and a rich orchestral score from Oscar®- winner Hans Zimmer. Award-winning actor Diogo Morgado ("REVENGE") portrays Jesus as the film spans from his humble birth through his teachings, crucifixion and ultimate resurrection.

    The movie is action-packed with special effects, powerful acting, and beautiful cinematography. It marks the first major motion picture about Jesus' life since "PASSION OF THE CHRIST", released ten years ago." - RIALTO DISTRIBUTION PR

    Jesus.